OP/ED
There's No Going Back
Voices from the Mountains:
Getting Started
OP-ED
There's No Going Back
by Jay Schuster
Every time a gay/lesbian rights issue comes up, it seems someone, somewhere, reacts to the negative attention of our opponents by asking that we be on our “best behavior.” What they often mean is that we should closet ourselves for the duration of the battle.
This came up repeatedly in our fights to pass gay rights legislation, hate crime legislation, and marriage legislation. Even now, I’ve heard murmurs in our own community that we should “lay low” so that our opponents will not unseat our allies in November.
There are several reasons why I think closeting ourselves, as a way to achieve our rights, is repugnant.
One argument used for laying low is that the ends justify the means. The potential reward is so big that suffering for a little while is no big deal. Unfortunately, the “temporary” suffering has a way of lasting longer and longer, so that, in the end, the means have become the ends, and staying in the closet has become the norm.
From an outside observer’s point of view, one who was not told of the trade-off made, it would seem that we had won the right to be out of the closet in exchange for staying in the closet. That’s a pretty empty victory.
Another argument against going back in the closet is, simply, that it is impossible. No matter how hard you try, some people will always know, and will think of you when scapegoating time comes. You could be a gay male couple living in the most liberal suburb in America, and if someone’s teenage boy disappeared under mysterious circumstances, do you really believe that your names wouldn’t be brought up as possible suspects? You could be as assimilated as you could possibly get, and you would still be marked.
The best argument for not closeting ourselves to get our rights, however, is a simple one: our opponents will have won if we closet ourselves. Our opponents would like nothing more than for all of us to just disappear. Their goal in oppressing us is to make us invisible. They want to isolate every single one of us so that we can’t come together in support, so that we can’t come together in families, and so that we can’t come together in power.
Life was like that once for me, and it was horrible. I have no plans to ever go back to it, no matter how temporarily.
So, in the end, when these battles are being fought, we should not closet ourselves. We should be up-front and honest with our families, friends, neighbors, coworkers, and even strangers on the street. They need to see that their votes affect real people – people they live with, work with, and share the community with. Many of these people do not write letters to the editor, take out advertisements in newspapers, or join political groups, but they do vote. If you can make one of them remember you when they cast their vote this fall, you will have done all of us a great service.
Jay Schuster lives in Colchester.