OP/ED
Time for "Don't Ask,
Don't Tell" to Go
Civil Unions and the
Destruction of Society
Voices from the Mountains:
Taking It to the Public
Since the Supreme Court announced their decision last December, my lover and I have been to one celebration, one counter-protest, two public testimony sessions, one small group meeting with one of our legislators, a vigil, and two public forums relating to their decision. In addition, I’ve listened to another public testimony session and one call-in radio show.
I expected that the discussion would turn nasty quickly. Each time I went to the statehouse I waited for glaring looks, waved Bibles, strict segregation based on viewpoint, yelling, and shouting.
That never happened. Everyone has been amazingly polite. I began to feel proud about how civil the discourse has been. Yes, I dislike being called a disease-spreading sodomite as much as the next guy, butat least the person saying that let me speak my turn, where I would like to think my civilized, secular response exposed his flawed logic.
Then I went to the public forum held in St. Albans on Tuesday, April 11.
It was held at Bellows Free Academy, the local high school. Dan and I attended because we thought that we might be needed as supporters, and besides, it was close to our Senate district.
We arrived early and sat in the auditorium next to a friend who had graduated there some 30-odd years ago. He warned us that we would be seeing some of Franklin County’s finest in action. I expected that pro-civil union folks would be outnumbered, but I was confident that the discussion would stay calm.
It was vicious. The editor of the St. Albans Messenger moderated, and I think even he was shocked at the unruliness of the anti-civil union camp.
Franklin County Senators George Costes (anti-civil union and co-author of the constitutional amendment to undo Baker v. State) and Sara Branon Kittel (then probably pro-civil union, now definitely so) were there. They were joined by Representative John Edwards from Swanton, who is on the House Judiciary Committee and voted pro-civil union, and others including Rep. Bill Lippert and Senator Dick McCormack. Edwards was actually booed by the anti-people. Kittel wasn’t treated much better.
The first person to speak set the tone for the evening. He got up and asked if anyone had ever been to San Francisco and seen what goes on there; how appalled he was that two men or women would hold hands or even kiss in public. If that ever happened here, he said he would have to take matters into his own hands, even if he got sent to jail for a thousand years. He later threatened some people in the back of the room, saying that he would meet them in the parking lot. A concerned witness to this called the Attorney General’s office to alert them to the problem.
After being asked several times to be quiet, to not interrupt, and to not clap so as to get through as many people as possible, whenever someone spoke anti-civil union there was loud applause and cheering. Whenever someone spoke pro-civil union there was either silence, or they would be interrupted, jeered, or booed. When Jo Henry Nunes’ young son spoke about being the adopted son of a gay dad, someone in the audience hollered “child abuse.” It was that bad.
When Jo Henry was called to speak, he gave the audience a lecture on class distinctions that exist in St. Albans to this day, calling the groups “Blockers” and “Snob Hill” and making reference to the churches the respective groups went to. That set the anti-group to foaming at the mouth. He was shouted down continually during his two minutes.
The most ironic moment of the evening came when a BFA student, originally from the state of Georgia, talked about how it had been very common to hear racist, Nazi, and other defamatory remarks as she was growing up, and how happy she was to be in Vermont where that didn’t happen. That said, she believed in the Bible and that God said whatever and was anti-civil union.
Afterwards, we walked with Jo Henry and his son to their car, just in case. So much for politeness.
The following day, Wednesday, April 12, there was a public forum held in North Hero, our district, although our senator was not going to be there. We hadn’t planned to attend this one, but thought the setting of a Methodist church might lead to a healing experience.
It was. There couldn’t have been a starker contrast with St. Albans. Everyone met downstairs for juice and cookies and then upstairs in the main hall. The people were mostly pro-civil union, and the event was sponsored by a faith-oriented support group for gay, lesbian, and allied people in the Islands.
The moderator was the minister of the church. Beth Robinson and John Edwards got up and spoke about the history of the bill, and took questions from the audience. People then shared their opinions. The moderator made a big deal of getting people to listen, and to respect each other’s viewpoints, and it worked. After the first person to speak got a round of applause, she said that if people were going to applaud, then the entire audience would have to applaud every speaker. And, remarkably, they did.
The first person to speak was a deacon at a born-again church in Richford. He was earnest, honest, and anti-civil union, but he garnered the respect of everyone there, which was a great start to the night.
In some ways it was very Quaker. Instead of drawing names from a hat, you raised your hand, stood up, introduced yourself, and spoke.
The Reform Party Candidate for Governor, Brian Pearl, spoke, appalled that the original revision of the bill would have allowed ö with parental permission ö 14-year-old boys to marry 50 year old men, just as 14-year-old girls are allowed to marry 50-year-old men now. People didn’t seem to understand the fuss, but even he got everyone’s applause.
It was just absolutely amazing at how civil and respectful everyone was. I spoke a bit about how rude the St. Albans forum had been. Afterwards people asked me what it was like and what made this one different. Some of it was that it happened in a church; some of it was that it was the Islands. But I think that the church aspect, combined with a moderator who was used to respect and clearly deserved it was the major reason.
I hope there are no more forums; especially ones that I feel obligated to go to. Although it was interesting to hear our opponents’ take on the situation, every one of their arguments has been addressed.
There was one I heard for the first time recently on a call-in radio show. An opponent of civil unions said that we should get some rights, but not all of them. He faltered when he was asked which ones, specifically, we should not get.
He didn’t answer, because there is no answer. We should get them all.