Gayity
Mr. Les B. Frank
Mr. Les B. Frank
Your Guidance Counselor for Life
Hey, Mr. Frank!
What is it with friends and boyfriends? My previous boyfriend used to literally drool every time a particular friend of mine visited. Although he never pursued anything with him, he openly admitted his interest and gave him extra attention.
In my present relationship, I discovered that a good fiend of mine tries to sneak conversations with my boyfriend – like when I leave the room for some reason. When I come back, he switches back to just giving him long looks and being in charming mode, when he is around.
Am I just too sensitive to this kind of situation? Is this all too common in our community? What's the best way to deal with something like this?
Hector
Dear Hector,
You’re dealing with two separate issues.
Any so-called good friend who is hot for your boyfriend and who makes moves on your man, behind your back, is no friend. He’s choosing his attraction to your boyfriend over his loyalty to you. Tell him that you don’t appreciate what he’s doing and give him a chance to change his ways. If he continues to behave as he has been, then put him out like yesterday’s trash.
The best thing about your previous boyfriend is that he is in the past. It’s normal to be attracted to some friends of our boyfriends, from time to time. But he sounds like the slobbering mutt down the street who humps my leg whenever he gets a chance. It may not go farther than that but it’s still tacky and he’s still a dog. So’s your ex.
Hey, Mr. Frank!
I've just started dating the most beautiful (inside and out) woman. We're the same age (33) and we both play the same musical instrument. I speak English and she speaks Castilian Spanish. I have never dated anyone who didn’t speak English as a primary language. Should I take a class? The only reason I am hesitant is that Castilian Spanish is different than the Spanish they teach in school. We communicate with about 400 Spanish words I know and the 5,000 English words she knows. I really want to learn Spanish the right way so she doesn't have to correct me all the time. What do you think about a Spanish to English dictionary and teaching myself?
Signed,
Como se dice
Dear Como,
The language of love can get us only so far.
You should definitely learn her native tongue. It’s a gesture of respect and affection, as much as a desire for better communication.
I did a computer search and there are software programs for her particular variation on Spanish. I don’t want to endorse any specific products, so I’d suggest you do a search using “Castilian Spanish” and check out your options.
Mr. Les B. Frank offers guidance counseling to people of all ages. Some letters are edited for length, spelling or grammar and all become the property of Les B. Frank. Send your questions and requests for guidance to HeyMrFrank@aol.com