Arts
A Resort to Howl About
Merle
Exit Reports from Tuscon’s Coyote Moon Resort
by Merle Exit
Editor's
Note: Travel writer Merle Exit offered to share with OITM readers her
impressions of a new gay and lesbian resort in Tucson, Arizona. Coyote
Moon opened in November 2004 with a significant number of staff wooed
away from the nearby world-class resort Miraval. Save your pennies, friends:
the least expensive room runs $1600-plus per person, double-occupancy
for a four-night package through mid-May, including three spa treatments,
all meals, and transportation to and from the airport.
Star gazing at the sky above Tucson, Arizona,
I caught meteor showers framing a first-quarter moon whose clarity made
it appear as if there were a lunar eclipse. The stillness of the desert
and views of surrounding cacti evolved into the sounds of distant coyote
and nearby pig-like javalinas blindly hoarding purposely-placed vegetation
in front of the welcome area of the 30-acre Coyote Moon Resort.
I recall the more-than-gay-friendly skies
of American Airlines transporting me to a much less than crowded airport
and being met by Todd Martin's dad, Mark. It was Todd who awakened partner
Joe Studer's mind, body and spirit and helped him decide to transform
a former guest ranch, nestled at the base of Sombrero Peak, into the first
holistic resort and spa geared to an older and more financially stable
gay and lesbian community.
I checked in, viewed the lay of the land
and was handed my itinerary for the next four days. As I unpacked in my
Spanish casita-style adobe and lava-stone guest room, I drank one of the
many bottles of water provided and thought how much I was looking forward
to relaxing and rejuvenating while hoping that the menu would not specialize
in tofu turkey, bean loaf and carob pudding.
But, alas, due to the predominance of vegetarian
guests, the Cooking Class, run by head chef Kelly Kimpton, a Miraval transfer,
focused on Butternut Squash ravioli in a wild mushroom sauce. For the
next two days the song, "It Was Flatuation" ran through my mind.
Do not fear, two days later I was finally blessed with a breakfast of
steak and eggs and a pheasant dinner.
Joe Studer and I had a chance to chat about
the resort. For the past ten years his Bostonian lifestyle was one of
living in a mansion, going to dinner parties and theatre, and trips to
both P-Town and Palm Springs. As we walked among the peacefulness of the
cacti, drinking a bottle of water, I understood why he gave it up –
and then requested a few bandages for the toe that just got pricked.
Lynn White, another Miraval transfer, now
Coyote Moon's Spa Manager, removed the thorn and treated me with an 80-minute
scrub and rebalancing Seaweed Wrap using Seaweed Mud, a blend of three
types of seaweed. A customized body cream made with goat milk followed.
A few days later, after drinking a bottle of water, I indulged in one
of her Vitality Facials. Still, I believe I may owe her my life for that
thorn bit.
Early morn had me venturing on a hot air
balloon excursion, despite my fear of heights (a.k.a "height-drophobia").
Thunderbird Adventures takes off from Coyote Moon's premises. It was an
enthralling experience drifting above red rocks, mountains, and a cotton
field. Boo boo time, as the basket immediately toppled over upon landing.
As I grabbed for safety and pitied the women I fell on, my poor nail ripped,
but hung, from my middle finger. I, of course, had to show everyone.
A manicurist was unavailable upon my return.
However, James McIlrath, Coyote's Spa Director and former Spa Director
of Miraval... perhaps a pattern here... performed the necessary surgery
and gave me a body-conditioning massage using Swedish strokes, shiatsu
stretches, reflexology, Reikei and cranial-sacral techniques. I drank
a bottle of water and thought how both my finger and I were grateful.
The mild temperatures beckoned me to stroll
the grounds. I said to myself, "Self, you can go for a swim in the
outdoor pool, play tennis, engage in a game of sand volleyball, or take
a dip in the Jacuzzi." Then I remembered that I don't know how to
swim, don't really like being in the water and since everyone was off
doing their own thing, tennis and volleyball were out of the question,
not to mention that I've never handled a tennis racket or played volleyball
since being in Lucille Kyvallos' gym class.
Lunch was a spiritual experience as I sat
amongst a water fountain and citrus trees located just outside of the
Clubhouse. Actually, it gave me an excuse to pick my own grapefruit and
orange.
After drinking a bottle of water, I decided
to feed and pet the horses over at the Corral, where a movie scene set
was the backdrop of Coyote Moon's Old West Town. There was the thought
of horseback riding. Although they offer this option these horses are
not part of the plan. Then I remembered that my fear of heights extended
to being on top of a horse.
An absolutely delectable dinner was followed
with a lecture on Tarot and Past Lives. Was I a camel is a past life?
Would it be in the cards for me to entertain at Coyote Moon? At first
I thought that Todd was going to play "Tea For One," but the
few guests and staff all showed for my audition. Being a Gemini, I performed
a scene from the Wizard of Oz with all of the characters and did my rendition
of "I Left My Heart In San Francisco."
I breathed the night air as it turned from
clear to odorous. There was a javalina a few feet away, snorting songs
of pumpkins, squash and brussel sprouts. Since it did not present a pork
chop in exchange, I gave it nothing.
The morning before my departure I went to
the area known as the Ramada, a partially enclosed space with tables,
chairs, couches, barbecue and band stand that abuts the Waterfalls Patio.
As I sat, drinking a bottle of water, I contemplated how much more unstressed
I was feeling, the freedom of being amongst my peers in a luxurious facility,
and the wish to return to a supportive and loving staff.
