Features
Menopause: It'll Happen to You
Bratt. Men's Project
Brattleboro
Men's Project
Participants Share Experiences
by
Jason Whipple
In
the May issue of Out in the Mountains, Alex Potter and Howie Peterson
shared their thoughts about their roles as coordinators of the Men’s
Program. This month, I had a conversation with Thom, Brad and Tom - three
men who have connected with other men as a result of the efforts of the
Men’s Program.
Thom, a 54-year-old man who came out
at the age of 36 and lives in Rowe, Massachusetts, is an active Tibetan
Buddhist and helped to begin the Spiritual group that meets monthly.
Brad, a 50-year-old man who has owned
his own landscaping company since 1982, lives in Peterborough, New Hampshire.
Tom, a 54-year-old man who is a special
education teacher and member of a local Congregational church where he
serves as the chair of the Board of Deacons and the Safe Church Committee,
lives in Orange, Massachusetts. Let’s hear what they have to say.
Jason: Hey guys, thanks for coming. So, what is your involvement with
the Men’s Program?
Tom: In 1994, I became a volunteer with the Men’s Program and a
buddy to a man living with HIV. From 1999 to 2004, I was employed part-time
by the Men’s Program as the newsletter and events coordinator. Currently,
I serve as a member of the Core Group - a grassroots group of guys who
get together monthly to plan Men’s Program events. Alex and Howie
are also part of the Core Group.
Thom: I began participating with Carrie Johnson from the very first efforts
he made to start reaching out. It is a joy to participate with [the Core
Group] - it’s very creative and even fun, not to mention that there’s
a wonderful potluck at every meeting.
Brad: I’ve been involved with the Men’s Program for about
two years. First as a participant in activities, but eventually I became
passionate about reaching out to all men and giving them a place to be
themselves - whatever that may be - and be around others who accepted
them as such.
Jason: What type of impact do you think the Men’s Program has had
on the men’s community?
Thom: I very much enjoy the flow of events and participate for the enjoyment
of being with such a fine mix of guys. I appreciate the strengthening
of the gay community and how it reaffirms my comfort being a gay man;
I see it constantly touching the lives of isolated bi and gay men in a
very nurturing way. Just sitting in a restaurant enjoying a meal with
other men is such a transforming experience for so many rural, semi-closeted
men - it really changes their outlook.
Tom: My involvement helped attract men to the program and made them feel
welcome. Peer outreach and social networking helped create norms around
safe sex because gay men became active members of their community. The
program is also a social alternative to bar-hopping, obsessive cruising
and isolation. I’m glad to be a part of that.
Jason: What do you think the men’s community needs to become a stronger
community?
Thom: Just looking at the new participants and members of the Core Group
shows how much the Men’s Program is expanding across the stratums
of the population. There seems to be a depth in the folks up here I very
much appreciate.
Brad: I am constantly trying to challenge the status quo to make sure
the Men’s Program is making it very clear that we accept all men
- regardless of their label or self-descriptions.
Tom: The men’s program needs more community involvement. This year,
we got funding to rent our own space separate from the offices of the
AIDS Project. That helps because it eliminates the stigma many men feel
about having to go into the AIDS Project building to participate in the
Men’s Program. To be stronger, we need guys to turn out regularly
and in greater numbers and we need sustained federal, state and local
funding to keep on going.
Jason: Is there anything else you’d like to add that you feel is
important to share?
Brad: I feel strongly that the men’s community needs more organizations
like the Men’s Program who are out there tirelessly trying to help
all men. The men’s community must stop putting such strong emphasis
on animalistic, unemotional sex.
Thom: I think the addition of new participants will shift the community
into its next evolutionary stage.
Jason Whipple was previously an editor of Out in the Mountains. He
lives in Brattleboro.